Runaways #13

Welcome to another exciting episode of Just How Badly Can They Screw Up RD's Favorite Comic?

With Runaways #13, Kathryn Immonen continues to bury some clever ideas under mounds of muddled dialogue and weak [and in some cases, conflicting - RD] characterization. Low points include:

1. Nico's spells: The witty phraseology of Nico's magic has long been a highlight of this series. Here, she casts three spells, and two of them were utterly wasted. "Crystal Light" made Klara's plants vanish, along with the debris of the house, but how? I didn't have the first clue what it was supposed to mean or accomplish. [All that came to mind was the nasty diet drink that comes in a powder that you add to your water so you can pretend you're being healthy when actually you're drinking cancer juice, but what does that have to do with mutant vines? - RD] "Mood ring" turned a cut on Hunter Stein's cheek into a lie detector (I think?), yet we never actually see Nico use that to test the man (more on that in a second). Kudos on "Abraham Lincoln" to create an instant log-cabin, though. THAT was good.

2. Klara: Remember how she was actually getting some page-time in the last two issues, even if most of that was a dubiously justified freak-out? Well, despite all the trouble she's caused, she gets exactly zero lines of dialogue here, and only one panel of any significance. She's calmed down, without any explanation. Apparently all it took was a sammich and a juice box. Oh kids, such simple creatures, no matter what century they're from.

[THIS was one of my biggest problems. Klara's freakout was such a huge deal in the first issue of this storyline - I thought FOR SURE we would get some major characterization and possibly some post-traumatic counseling for the poor girl. Turns out it was a momentary dramatic lapse in sanity and Karolina has taken care of it (because even with Nico back in take-charge mode, something as deep as an emotional breakdown is Just! Too! Much! for the "leader" to deal with, OMG don't even get me started on the utter shite Immonnen is doing to Nico's characterization and how badly I wanted to PUNCH HER FACE when she... okay, I'll stop). - RD]

3. Hunter Stein: So Chase is sure he accidentally killed his uncle, and insists the Runaways can't trust the man claiming to be Hunter Stein. Fine. So why doesn't anyone bother to follow this up, to ask Hunter point-blank about his "death"? Wouldn't that be the first thing you'd do in this situation? Instead, the Runaways ignore him - endangering themselves in the process - until they can put him to work. The plot is kept moving at the expense of any semblance of character logic, and it knocks me right out of the story. To make matters worse, Hunter devolves into a ridiculous plot bunny to reveal all the wondrous inventions hidden away in the Runaways' own home that the teens have heretofore failed to discover. Hunter goes so far as to accuse the Runaways of being the "least curious group of kids" he's ever seen. Exsqueeze me? We're talking about the kids who discovered their parents were super villains, dug up a whole bunch of said parents' hidden toys and magics, and used those tools to turn themselves into kick-a$$ superheroes. Is this writer seriously trying to tell me that these kids are lacking in imagination, just so her new character can become their spirit guide? Is she really trying to put a Magic Adult in the last comic that should ever need one?

4. Bard Reffrinse, Ur Doin It Wrong: Nico starts comparing Chase to Hamlet while accusing him of "uncle-cide", and Karolina replies, "But Hamlet doesn't actually kill his uncle, does he?" Umm, actually he did. With the stabbity stabbing. It may be said that I'm a little obsessed with my Shakespeare (teeny bit), so lines like this will bother me all out of proportion. If it was meant to suggest that the kids aren't all that classically educated (perhaps in keeping with the arc's title, "Homeschooling"), then that's a little too subtle for me. If the italics are meant to imply that Karolina is in fact referring to Chase rather than the original Hamlet (perhaps so Molly and Klara won't overhear the older girls discussing if their bud just ended a dude?), that too needs explication. Because otherwise I'm just gonna think somebody doesn't know their classic literature* and completely failed to GTS**.

There could be a fascinating plot fighting to get out here, there could even be some interesting takes on the characters, but Runaways is drowning in nonsensical, non-sequatorial characterizations and fuzzy dialogue. I'm just incredibly frustrated with this book right now.

[For the record, we could have gone on for pages about the total suckitude of this issue, but mostly I just want to say SERIOUSLY KATHRYN IMMONEN PLEASE STOP. YOU ARE RUINING EVERYTHING THAT IS GOOD AND HOLY ABOUT THESE CHARACTERS. IF YOU DO NOT SHAPE UP, I WILL STRIKE YOUR STORYLINE FROM THE RECORD. - RD]

- JC

* Which is fine. Not everyone's college degree is as awesome, useful, and lucrative as my B.A. in English Literature.
** And that's just sad.

Spider-Man and the Human Torch

Spider-Man and the Human Torch collects Dan Slott's five part miniseries from 2005, with five separate stories of team-ups between the webhead and the hothead. It chronicles the evolution of a friendship through the years - from the squabbling teens of the 1960s to something close to brothers in the pre-reboot 2000s. Each issue evokes a different era of Spider-Man and the Fantastic Four, marked by changes in their supporting casts, yet the tone rarely strays from pure wacky fun. With one impressive exception.

The collection includes the most poignant tale you will ever read about the most useless super-conveyance in the annals of comicdom: The Spider-Mobile. The real story of why a guy who can swing from a web with the greatest of ease needs a frickin' car is seriously and unexpectedly beautiful, and worth the price of the book all on its own.

Equally worthy of a shout-out is the tome's final issue, a little too talky to be succinctly summarized here, but a great summation of the contrast and the bond between the two titular heroes. From a 2009 standpoint, it serves to reinforce the tragedy of Spider-Man's "Brand New Day" reboot. Not only has Spider-Man lost the life he'd built with Mary Jane (a life that made him the envy of rockstar superhero Johnny Storm), but in forcing the world to forget his secret identity, he's diminished some fantastic friendships (pun intended).

Some may think Spider-Man works best as a tragic loner, but I don't buy it. He's worked hard to forge these relationships, through 40+ years of funny books, and he deserves to enjoy them in full.

And if that weren't enough, Slott even finds a way to incorporate these classic Hostess ads into canon. If that ain't great comics, then I don't know what is.

- JC

Uncanny X-Men First Class #2

In Uncanny X-Men First Class #2 (Scott Gray) Nightcrawler's Exciting Adventure With the Inhumans comes to a promising if not 100% satisfying conclusion.

Here, Nightcrawler (Kurt Wagner) is put on trial for his interference with the Terrigenesis ritual, whereby human-like Inhuman children are physically mutated and granted super-powers. He makes an impassioned argument that the children are "perfect from birth," and it is wrong for their elders to enforce mutation on them at such an early age. He goes so far as to evoke "another society" with a genetic superiority/inferiority complex--but I'll allow both Nightcrawler and Scott Gray a pass on Godwin's Law as the former is himself German. It's logical, and perhaps even important, for the spectre of Nazism to haunt a German mutant. (And suddenly I'm wondering if anyone ever wrote a scene wherein Nightcrawler and Magneto get into an intense debate/discussion about WWII Germany. I find it hard to imagine Chris Claremont missing out on that idea, but I'm not sure I've yet come across it myself.)

"I know your traditions span centuries," Nightcrawler says, summing up his case, "But a healthy society should always have the capacity for change... I find it tragic that, in a culture where no two beings are alike, you should demand such conformity."

It's a wonderfully eloquent argument, and a bit of a pleasant surprise. After Nightcrawler's swashbuckling antics last issue, I was afraid his very good questions about the Inhuman lifestyle would be brushed aside--that pat statements would be made about judging other people's cultures from the outside, and Kurt would end up apologizing for running off half-cocked. I was glad to see him given his dignity instead, and his arguments given some weight.

If only some. Inevitably the other X-Men show up in Attilan, Nightcrawler's trial is cut short, and a big honking mutant vs. Inhuman fight ensues. In the middle of this, Nightcrawler is confronted by the Inhuman Karnak, who says he was never subjected to the Terrigen mists, and assures Kurt that he is no less valued by his people because of this fact. This may be the start of a decent rebuttal to Kurt's concerns, but sadly the argument never gets pursued any further.

Then again, perhaps the beginnings of a great debate are the most that can be asked of a title set in the Marvel universe's past. Props to Mr. Gray for getting these questions out there, and here's hoping that future writers of the Inhumans pick up that gauntlet.

I'd still like to see more jokes and wacky banter in Uncanny First Class, though. (As much as I've enjoyed the Wolverine-kicked-over-the-horizon gag.)

- JC

Fantastic Four: Dark Reign #5

A few months ago I raved about the first issue of Jonathan Hickman's Fantastic Four: Dark Reign miniseries. I've kept quiet about the issues since, because I kept waiting for Hickman to pull a plot out of his hat and make good on that early promise. Instead, we got three issues of alternate reality silliness that went nowhere (doesn't Sue make a sexy gunslinger? Doesn't Sue make a bad-@$$ World War 2 commando? Oh look, it's the ever-so-merry Elizabethan FF*!), and now the series has wrapped with little more than a tease for Hickman's upcoming run on the regular Fantastic Four title.

Reed returns from his interdimensional jaunt. He lies to his wife about dismantling the machine that just endangered his family's lives. (How does the "smartest man" in the Marvel universe keep forgetting what a bonehead move that always is?) Norman Osborn backs off from the Baxter Building after the Richards' son Franklin shoots Norman in the shoulder with a pop-gun. How's that work? Never explained. And we get a glimpse of shadowy beings waiting between dimensions, promising to help Reed in his ambiguous quest to "solve everything." Which is also apparently the title of Hickman's first regular FF story.

Oh, and Reed has become convinced that the only thing that could have saved the world from the consequences of the Marvel's Civil War, Secret Invasion, etc. would have been if he had faced these problems alone. If he's wrong, it's hubris worthy of a Greek tragedy. Yet so far we've seen nothing to contradict Reed's supposition, and I'm more afraid that Hickman really does intend for Reed to be that unique. It's an utterly implausible conceit: in a multiverse of infinite** possibilities, we're to believe Reed Richards is the only man capable of saving the Earth from Skrulls and itself? Did Reed's Reality Bridge transport this series into the DC Universe by mistake?

Perhaps the story of the Bridge was doomed*** from the start. Perhaps the reason no one has explored alternate-reality problem solving in 40+ years of Fantastic comics is because there's no satisfying place for that story to go. Even if Reed discovers some great solution to the world's dilemmas, can we truly appreciate a resolution the hero never personally had to fight for? Or maybe this story has barely begun, and Hickman will wow us yet. But that still won't excuse these 4 out of 5 issues of FF: Dark Reign in which nothing really happened.

Marvel, please. If you've got a story that's at least passably self-contained, go ahead and make it a mini-series. If an arc is just the beginning of a longer epic, I'm cool with that too, just put it in the main title from the start. Is that so much to ask?

- JC

* No relation to 1602's Four from the Fantastick
**That word still means what I think it means, right?
**Not a pun, the Doc's not even in this story - unless his latest fiendish plot is just that cunning?

Top 5 Marvel Marriages

Marriage is awesome. Even in the Marvel universe, however tragically unhip Quesada will claim it makes a person. To prove this fact, and to celebrate RD's and my impending nuptials this Saturday, I give you:

5. Jessica Jones & Luke Cage: What do Marvel's premiere interracial couple have to say about black men and white women? I have no idea, and honestly, I don't really care. What matters to me is everything they say about men and women, full stop. Bendis writes them as a beautifully normal couple in a crazy world. Their conversations about diaper changes, grocery runs, and raised toilet seats help make the the New Avengers matter. We know these people, and what they're fighting for.

Top mush moment: Jessica's speech at their wedding, from New Avengers Annual #1 (Bendis).

"This world is a scary place. You being an Avenger--it's so... scary. Every day there's some idiot in our face trying to ruin it. And ever since we got together, I just haven't cared. And no goon attacked us at our wedding, so I'm going to take that as a good sign. And even if the worst happens... It's a weird feeling--But I know we can deal with it. Look at that kid over there. Look at her. We made her. And I love watching you be a father. So much so that I'd wear this big poofed-out dress. I just wanted to let you know in my words. This is why I said yes to all this crazy. That's why."

Sorry. Bendis likes to make with the yak-yak. But all that stuff, that's how I feel about RD. I mean, not the stuff about her being an Avenger (that'd rock) or making babies (just yet) or goons attacking (I hope they don't, but we'll deal). But the world-is-crazy-but-who-cares-cause-she's-there? Absolutely.

4. Reed (Mr. Fantastic) Richards & Sue (Invisible Woman) Storm: Do these guys need an explanation?

Top mush moment: Ultimate Fantastic Four #7 (Warren Ellis). In the Ultimate universe, Reed and Sue are in their early twenties, and they've only just acquired their powers. Sue's a genius biologist to match Reed's head for physics. She drags him out of his lab, insisting he let her run some tests on his new physiology...

Reed: "Can we make out afterwards? Only I think I'm getting good at it."
Sue (kissing him): "You started out good at it. You're getting fantastic."

Yes, I realize they're not actually married in the Ultimate universe. But the fact is--and I realize how lame I'm about to sound, but hey, what's the internet for, if not for embarrassing personal admissions (and porn)--the first time I got to make out with RD, I showed her this scene afterwards. Because it was the first time I'd made out with anyone, and RD, kind and compassionate soul that she is, had said something to me not unlike Sue's line above, so I just had to share.

I'm that colossal a dork, and she's marrying me anyway.

3. Bobbi (Mockingbird) Morse & Clint (Ronin nee Hawkeye) Barton: Eight months ago, I barely knew who Mockingbird was. Now, she and Ronin are #3 on this list. See previous posts re: New Avengers: Reunion (Jim McCann) for why.

Top mush: New Avengers: Reunion #4. Once married, now technically divorced, Clint & Bobbi decide to try dating for the first time.

2. Peter (Spider-Man) Parker & Mary Jane Watson: Still married in my mind--not to mention Stan Lee's hi-larious newspaper strip.

Top mush: Honorable mention to Peter & MJ's wedding in Amazing Spider-Man Annual #21 (Jim Shooter & David Michelinie), but I'm actually going to go with Amazing Spider-Man #491 (J. Michael Straczynski). Pete and Mary Jane have been separated for a time (don't ask), Peter just helped Captain America take down Doctor Doom in the middle of a crowded airport (like ya do), and now he's finally got a chance to tell her...

"I can do 'all these things' because you believe in me. Because you give me the strength and will to get them done. Everything's easier when you're there and harder when you're not. Without you, nothing works the way it should. But when you're there, in my life, I feel like I can do anything, MJ. Anything."

I'm mozzarella, I know, but again--approaching the big day that I am, this is how I feel. It's amazing (no pun intended) how one person can turn every problem and struggle on its head, with nothing but their presence.

And the #1 marriage in Marvel comics...

1. Scott (Cyclops) Summers and Jean (Insert Codename Here) Grey!*

It's trendy among some X-writers these days to say that "all Jean ever did was die on Scott," and I think that spectacularly misses the point of this couple. The reason Jean & Scott are the greatest pair in comics, the reason their love story is one of my favorites in all of fiction, is precisely because of all the dying, and replacement by dopplegangers, and alternate-possible-future children showing up, and everything else they've endured. Luke & Jessica, Peter & MJ... they talk about getting through the crazy together, and they live in the Marvel universe too, so they're certainly not exaggerating. But Scott & Jean have been through more than all the other couples on this list combined. Their honeymoon was 12 years long, wandering across an Apocalyptic future Earth, while they raised Scott's son Nathan (The Man Who Would Be Cable) and started a revolution. The mess that is the post-Morrison X-verse is just one more temporary setback. Love like this is unstoppable.

Top mush moment: from Uncanny X-Men #296 (Scott Lobdell), the panel below. Flying and kicking ass together towards the end of the "X-Cutioner's Song" 1993 mega-crossover.



"As opposed to Cyclops, Jean Grey has always embraced her mutant abilities. Blessed with the natural talents of telepathy and telekinetics, she felt she couldn't be any happier with her mutant gifts. That was before Scott Summers. Before she'd sacrificed her life on his behalf--only to learn there are greater powers than death in the universe... and the greatest of these is love."


*****


So clearly, committed partnerships rule. I couldn't be happier to be getting a ring if it was green and turned willpower into solid light holograms.**


- JC

*Surprised readers raise their hands. Anyone? No?

**Was that a bit much, honey? [This is why we're not having a ceremony. He would have wanted to write his own vows, and I don't think he could have gotten this post down to 2 minutes. - RD]

details, details

Another reason I don't read a lot of comics is that I don't have the required capacity for minutiae. Now I'm no dummy; I love me some crossword puzzles, and I'd go head-to-head with any other Jeopardy! viewer at 7:30 weekdays (oh, Trebek), but the sheer amount of detail needed to comprehend the vast universes and the characters living therein frankly blows my mind.

Take a look at the X-Men. You've got Uncanny X-Men, Ultimate X-Men, X-Men First Class, Uncanny X-Men First Class, Unspammy X-Spam First Spam, and so on and so forth. Most of those books are in slightly different universes. If you want to read any of the others, you have to separate out which is canon in which book, and then there are the other X-teams and the Canadian teams and the Wolverine teams (that guy is the town bicycle, am I right?) and books with writers who don't write the book anymore but they begged to finish their own damn storylines and they've been going for like 40 years and they've only aged about 10 and GOOD GOD EMMA FROST PUT SOME CLOTHES ON. NO ONE NEEDS TO SEE THAT. EVER.

Just now, I was telling JC how much I like the way he looks in his purple shirt. We're getting married in 3 days, I can do sappy shit like that. He says,

"I don't have a purple shirt."

"Wait, what?" says I.

"I've never had a purple shirt," he says confidently.

Dear readers, I bought JC a purple shirt and two new pairs of pants no more than a month ago, and he wore the purple shirt twice. He agreed that he looks very fine in it. Now he's forgotten it ever existed. (Edit: He found the shirt on the shelf with the tags still on it. We were both wrong.)

AND YET. Mention just a few words to this same man - "House of M" or "Chris Claremont" or, god forbid, "Spider-Man reboot" - and he'll expound for hours, discussing not only the main storyline but all adjoining storylines and interviews with the writers and artists and editors and why he doesn't care for Joe Quesada. (Neither do I, for the record, but only because I blame him for every sucky script I read.) I think that without the capacity to hold these details in his head, he'd simply be flipping the pages for the pretty pictures, so I appreciate the enormous brain power that goes into his comic habit.

It's not easy to be the partner of a comic fan. Every night at the dinner table is an adventure in the vast network of connections between comics, books, TV, and movies that is JC's beautiful mind. I can usually remember my to-do list from one day to the next, but his fully coherent stream of consciousness astounds me. When he starts talking, all I can do is sit back and enjoy the ride. It might not be so frustrating if the babble didn't contain its own inertia, if I could easily redirect him by asking about his day at work or telling a funny story of my own; more often than not, he'll listen more-or-less patiently while I talk, and then pick up where he left off, always adding, "Just one more thing, just let me say this one thing." And then, because I love him, I sigh and let him keep talking. I've learned more about the Marvel Universe in the past two years than I ever thought it was possible for a non-comic-reader to know. And I've loved every minute of it.

He'd better wear that purple shirt tomorrow.

- RD

hey look at that! a post on the very day a comic came out!

SARA PICHELLI WHAT THE HELL.

Oh hi. I just read Runaways #12, titled "Homeschooling: Part Two - Functions and Relations." It made me sort of angry.

I'm not sure why Kathryn Immonen decided to vague things up at the beginning. Who is making this speech? I thought Karolina, JC thought Nico. Either way, it's a great emo introduction to the issue, but there's nothing to really tie it in. Is this meant to express the group's feelings about losing their home (again) and their friend (also again)? Or just explain why Karolina is so ridiculously thin (anorexia caused by test anxiety)?

The conversation between the teens is less hip but more stilted even than in the last issue. Maybe it's because I'm a Bendis girl (and JC writes the same way, with as many words per panel as humanly possible), but when a four-panel page includes two largely identical shots and one close-up with only 10-20 words per panel? Too slow. By the time Karolina responds to Victor, I've forgotten what he said or why she's making a snide (vaguely racist against Cyborg Americans) comment.

However, Molly busting out the BSG reference? Never not hilarious.

More troubling is the way the teens are acting towards each other. Though they've argued before, I can't recall an entire issue in which NOTHING HAPPENED. A few arcs ago, they were affected by Nico's Scatter spell, after which they realized that their strength as a team was in sticking together. Now, Klara has been randomly plot-bunnied into a completely unexpected mental breakdown (...seriously?) and the rest of them are fussing about what to do.

Look, Immonen. The point of the Runaways is that they've gotten past the normal teenage shit. Well, not the prom and the crushes and the not infrequent stupid decisions, but the indecisive irresponsibility. These kids have taken the weight on their shoulders because of their evil parents. They grew the fuck UP. I get that you want them to be carefree teens thrust into a world of pain and danger and high stakes, but they've been there and done that. They know that above all, they have to DEAL WITH IT.

[I think the opening monologue is more of the same, here. The blank page is Nico's metaphor for how she feels when she's trying to come up with a spell to fix whatever the team's gotten itself into now. It's the pressure she's under as both a leader and a literal miracle-worker, every time she has to step up to the plate. But while that's an interesting pressure to explore, like RD says, but the execution is just not Runaways. They are NOT freaking Hamlet. They act first and angst later. Runaways are dynamic by definition. - JC]

For that matter, why the hell has Nico suddenly decided to not be the leader? In the past, Karolina has been the nurturing earth mother flower child while Nico puts on her stompy boots and makes a plan. Apparently Nico forgot to wear her big girl panties (did she lose them along with the rest of her outfit and her fashion sense?) and is just cuddling Klara while the others bicker and stall until Chase's uncle shows up. I'm pretty stoked about that - JC says Chase mentioned that he murdered a carjacker during Vaughn's run - and the military guys are usually fun, so I'm not done reading yet.

And back to my first point, SARA PICHELLI WHAT THE HELL WAS GOING ON WITH THOSE SLUTTY FAIRIES. Are we supposed to assume that Nico generated them on purpose? Somewhere in her subconcious she thinks that fairies are wee, buxom, naked lasses? Aside from what that says about Nico's character, did YOU really think that the exaggerated proportions and maximum skin showing was absolutely necessary in this comic? I AM SO TIRED OF THAT.

And... I sort of hate to bring it up, because I'm not an artist so it's not like I could do it better, but I get the feeling that Chase's facial expression on the last page was meant to be very important. However, and this is a big however, I can't tell what the f#$% it's supposed to be. At first I thought it was a sneer, then I thought it was disgust, then I thought maybe Chase smelled something nasty or he had to pee really badly. Maybe next time just go for "stone faced" if you can't pick out a clear expression.

Enough from me. I'm going to go take the cat for a walk.

- RD

Runaways #11

If Runaways #11 were a beer commercial, the slogan would be, "Tastes hip! Less filling!"

Brian K. Vaughan's original Runaways stories were a soap-operatic teenage roller coaster. After Joss Whedon sent Nico, Karolina, Victor, Chase, Molly, Xavin, and Old Lace on a time travelling vacation, Terry Moore attempted to give the teens a little grounding, setting them up in a malibu mansion abandoned by Chase's parents. From there they fought aliens and zombies, and started to rediscover their super-heroic ambitions.

New writer Kathryn Immonen and new artist Sara Pichelli, in their first issue, blow the Runaways' cozy home life to smithereens again. Literally. It's a crystal-clear statement of their intentions: to make Marvel's premier youth-rebellion book feel edgy again. But as the same clarity isn't always evident in the execution, the results are decidedly mixed.

Immonen works a little too hard to remind us that the Runaways are adolescents, flighty and hormonal. At the risk of sounding like an old man at 28, the fast-paced, jargon heavy dialogue, with internet-speak every other word, wants to be more charming than it is. And some important bits of characterization get muddled in the sound bytes.

For example, a few issues back, Xavin left the Runaways to take Karolina's place on trial on the alien world of her birth. Now Karolina is angsting (and flirting with Chase). Will she ever see her lover again? Does she have to start over as a single girl? So Nico sits her down and tells her: "I don't think it's the last thing Xavin will ever do, but it is the last thing she did for you. So just honor it... and yourself. Okay?"

Is Nico telling her friend:

a) "Don't worry about it, buddy, Xavin'll be back in no time!"

b) "Go on with your life, Xavin would want you to be happy! But don't settle for a dirty boy like Chase."
c) "You're gay, remember? And I'm curious. Let's make the 1950s weep!"

Each of these could be variously interpreted to fit with Nico's character [whether her character this week is "inspiring optimist" or "slutbomb" - RD], but it's not really clear what she actually means to say.

I was glad to see Klara finally getting some character time, but disappointed that she felt so inconsistent with the Klara of the past 10 issues. Terry Moore never seemed to know what to do with Klara, so he treated her like Molly's sidekick and exposition-companion. It was cute, but it ignored what really makes the character fascinating and unique: she's a girl from the 1910s stuck in the modern world. Now Immonen seems to have turned Klara into a chronic couch potato. The concept has potential; of course the boob tube would be fascinating to a kid who grew up in a time before them. But Klara's been around TV for a while now, and she's never been this addicted. Nico's suddenly worried that Klara's going to develop a "Vitamin-D deficiency," after several issues of Klara running around outside with Molly. If Klara's withdrawing into herself and becoming a TV zombie, this might be a perfectly natural reaction for a girl out of time; it might even be a perfectly natural delayed reaction. But it seems more like Immonen wasn't sure what else to do with her and wanted to shove her out of the way.

I also would really like to have seen a little more development of Klara's relationship with Old Lace, considering her intense reaction to the dinosaur's death. She spends the early part of the issue cuddling with Old Lace in front of the television, only to demand that the others "get that dead thing away from me!" after OL dies saving her life. The line isn't consistent with her character (what there is of it), nor is it a particularly natural thing for a traumatized kid to say. [Considering that as a resident of the early 20th century, she would have had a lot closer relationship with death than most people today, I would have expected sorrow or indifference, but not repugnance. - RD]

I really haven't decided yet how I feel about Sara Pichelli's art. I love some of the little details, like Victor reminding us he's a 'bot by plugging a modem directly into a port on his own arm. I love the playfulness when Chase and Victor are dancing. The shots of Chase on the ground feeling Old Lace's passing through their psychic bond were truly heartbreaking, and easily the best scene in the issue.

I like some of Pichelli's dynamic poses (when the older girls aren't breaking their backs) and exaggerated facial expressions, but these dance right on the knife's edge between expressive and unnatural. Witness Nico squinting at her fruit salad.

Closing one eye and screwing your mouth up like that, they're pieces of two different expressions. They're both in the pensive family, sure, but... Go try and make this face in the mirror. Feels weird, doesn't it?

Then there's Nico's new wardrobe and body-type. RD soap-boxed about this some in her review of issue 10 (speaking of gender), but what struck me is that this is another case of previously strong characterization getting muddled. The artists of Runaways have always taken Nico's clothes right off of HotTopic.com, but Nico's choices in the past have been definitively goth-prep, giving her some of the coolest costumes in comics. Now, suddenly, she's goth-punk. Those are two distinct styles, and different enough that I believe the change would warrant some dialogue.

Also, I'm a bit confused by those dirty little scratches everyone has on their noses and under their eyes. Judging from the coloring, they're all taking lessons in being a drunk from W.C. Fields. Also not an atypical part of the teenage experience, I guess. More worrying is the way they all seem to have developed a bad case of vampirism, and not the cool kind. The least bit of overhead light, and even Latino Victor and California girl Karolina are sparkling like Robert Pattinson.

Oh, and late in the issue, the sound from the TV indicates Klara is now watching an infomercial for a fitness machine, yet the screen still shows the soap opera from earlier. Whoops.

- JC

[I'd like to note that because I don't pay very close attention and because they traded hairstyles, I spent the entire issue thinking Chase was Victor and vice versa. That's not entirely abnormal for me; I got Victor and Xavin confused in earlier issues when Xavin was in human-boy mode. But there really should have been some defining character moment (aside from the plugging into the arm thing, which I completely missed) so I could tell them apart. So I count it as a double fail. - RD]

Magneto Testament

Magneto Testament (Greg Pak) is the first Marvel hardcover I've seen to include a Teacher's Guide in the back. That fact alone says much about the story. It's not just the origin of the X-Men's greatest foe, but a serious holocaust drama, closely modeled on real history and real human lives. And the real beauty, and tragedy, of Testament is that it never needs to be a superhero story at all.

If a person were to pick up this story without ever having read an X-Men story (or having seen the films), they would never guess the protagonist was a mutant. Max Eisenhardt's journey takes him from schooldays in 1930s Nazi Germany, to the Warsaw Ghetto in Poland, and eventually to the infamous concentration camp of Auschwitz. Every horror that befalls Max and his family, every neighbor's sacrifice that sustains them, and every cruelty that dooms them all ring true because of the painstaking work of Testament's creative team.

The tale is deeply grounded in research; Pak's extensive endnotes in the collected edition excavate the story page by page, revealing the actual historical people and events from which even seemingly minor details were drawn. (We all hated compiling bibliographies for our papers in school; who'da thunk they could make a comic book more impressive?) The script is excellent. Pak sketches in the broad strokes of history for context, then pulls his focus in tight the on small and human moments, brought to gut-wrenching life by artist Carmine Di Giandomenico. The whole epic is near-perfectly paced, and deftly balanced between grinding heartbreak and slivers of hope. And for those of us who do know the man Max Eisenhardt will one day become, there's a second story hiding in plain sight.

Pak and Di Giandomenico evoke Max's future with a perfectly simple recurring visual trick: a glint of light reflecting off metal. It's there when Max hurls a heavy javelin in school games, and when he's scrounging for coins in the gutter. It's there on the knife in Max's hand as he watches two Nazis beating a man in an alleyway, as his uncle stops him from getting involved, getting himself killed. Those of us who know his power and his future can't help wonder - perhaps he could have killed those soldiers, perhaps he could've saved that man? And it makes the tale of Max's impotence in that terrible time and place only more potent.

As the background for a loathed and beloved comic book villain, it makes Magneto's place in the X-Men universe all the greater. The horrors he experiences in these pages haunt every Magneto story to come (even the hokey ones), for this is the world he always fears might return, if he can do nothing to stop it. And that fear, in turn, drives him to inflict his own terrors on others. Yet in his long history in the X-Men universe, Magneto has also enjoyed the occasional stint as a hero. Horrid 1980s purple costumes aside, I hope he may yet again and for good. After spending these five issues with young Max, I find myself hoping that Magneto's story might somehow yet wind up in the light. I want his story to find, if not a happy ending, then at least a measure of peace.

Still, it's just as important that Testament can be read as if Max were just an ordinary man, with no special abilities or destiny. The power of any story, no matter how fanciful, comes from our ability to believe. We will believe a man can fly because deep down, we all know what flying feels like, or what it should feel like. We will let a fictional character break our hearts because we've been broken, and we've watched others be broken. We know fictions, even science-fictions, are made for us because someone in the world has felt this way. But there is a special double-edge to a story like Magneto Testament, enriching the fictional life of a comic book villain, even as it pays homage to the struggles of millions of survivors and victims of a real-world genocide.

- JC

Uncanny X-Men First Class #1

Scott Gray's new Uncanny X-Men First Class is perfectly uncanny so far, but could still use some more of that First Class magic.

This new take on an old series brings the fan-favorite 70s X-Men line-up back to the funnybooks: Cyclops, Storm, Wolverine, Colossus, Nightcrawler, and Banshee. Phoenix is featured on the rocking cover, but so far has only merited one tiny cameo scene. The first issue taps all the classic Claremontian story beats: hateful-fearful mobs of New Yorkers forcing an X-Man to question the mission; giant robot fights in the Danger Room; cheesy boastful mid-action dialogue; Wolverine picking a fight; Colossus being all sensitive and noble and stuff; random men hitting on Storm.

It also has a solid story of its own to tell about Nightcrawler visiting Attilan, city of the Inhumans, a place where nearly everyone is just as unique in appearance as himself and no one gets called a freak. Of course he begins to wonder - would he be happier here? Is he really obligated to put up with the world's crap? But there may be a serpent in this garden, because he finds that children are being mutated against their will!

Well, not really. Most anyone who's read an Inhumans story before will be aware that the ceremony Nightcrawler interrupts is a perfectly natural part of Attilan culture. Human-looking children walk into the Terrigen Mists when they come of age, and they come out with funky new powers and often with a wild new alien appearance. If you go in a cute blonde and walk out a tall purple baldie with fewer fingers than you started with, well, them's the breaks. I think it's supposed to be a puberty-sucks-sometimes metaphor. That Stan Lee, such a subtle guy.

Actually, Nightcrawler kind of has a point. It IS pretty creepy. But I'm not expecting Marvel to let one X-Man overturn the crux of Inhumans culture; it wouldn't really be PC to their fictional society. Also, the series is set in the past. But we'll see how that plays out next issue.

The problem with UXFC #1 is that it's all a bit po-faced. That's also true of the original Uncanny era during which this book is set, of course; when I read the old 70s X-Men comics, most of the humour I find now is probably not of the intentional variety. The fact that everyone takes everything so seriously is what makes it hilarious. (That, and the way they all spend nine-tenths of their day expositing madly in their head.) But I've been spoiled by Jeff Parker's original X-Men: First Class, Bendis' New Avengers, and Brian Vaughan's and Joss Whedon's Runaways. When I read a modern team-book, I want more banter, playfulness, and just plain off-the-wall wackiness. I want the characters to take each other just as seriously, to treat each other just as politely, as my friends and co-workers treat each other.

I've said it before; I think the First Class line works best by having fun with the X-Men characters in a way most of the other mutant books haven't allowed for many an emo year. And I believe Scott Gray is capable of bringing the comedy; his Wolverine short in the Uncanny X-Men First Class Giant-Size was great. Hopefully as UXFC goes on, he'll find more of a balance.

- JC